I’m a big believer in following your heart and your gut (aka intuition). I’ve tried following my head by doing what I thought was the proper thing to do, what was expected of me, what was acceptable. But you know what? It hasn’t fulfilled me.
When I decided 4 years ago to become a nutritionist, I wanted to help everyone. At school they emphasized finding your niche. I had been stuck doing the same job for 30 years. The last thing I wanted was to “find a niche” which to me at the time meant “pigeon holed” into doing the same thing over and over. Well … I tried that for a short time and quickly realized that was not going to work.
So I did some soul searching and thinking about what really mattered to me and whom I really wanted to help. And I realized that my ideal client was myself 5 years ago. The overweight, low energy, frustrated, tired, uninspired middle-aged woman who I always said I never wanted to become. That’s the problem with focusing on what you don’t want … you end up there instead of where you want to be.
This was how I came to focus on hormone balancing. With hormone balancing often comes weight loss, which is really important and is often part and parcel with getting your hormones balanced. So off I went, focusing on weight loss. Problem is that’s what a LOT of people are doing and while it is important and I will always help women who struggle with their weight, it didn’t light me up. And then I stumbled on what does and I’ve decided to pursue this. My passion is helping women with their sexual health and wellness.
A little back story if I may. Back in school, my final speech was on women, menopause and sex. I found the topic so interesting and so hard to condense into a 15 minute speech. So I read and read and wrote and wrote and then had to edit … a lot. I discovered I was very comfortable talking about this topic and even adding some tasteful humour along the way. And while I found it really interesting and wanted to help, I didn’t think it would be “appropriate” or “acceptable”. Why, I have no idea. Perhaps I was still ruled by too much fear and what “society” would think and whether there was even a need. But I knew that there was definitely a need and it was that fear that keeps so many of us silent.
Right after graduation, life took a left turn and threw me into 15 months of the worst stress of my life. I wasn’t taking care of myself, my weight was climbing and my hormones were out of whack again. I decided it was time to get help, so I turned to a very well respected nutritionist who specializes in hormone balancing and whom I love to pieces. The women in her group were amazing and the last monthly challenge I was involved in was a sex challenge. The rawness and openness that these women communicated was inspiring and heart wrenching. I did what I could to support them as we all supported each other. I was able to open up to these women whom I had never met but had gotten to know well and share things I hadn’t been able to tell anyone else.
And then it was time for me to leave and pursue my own dream of helping other women and being of service to them. I was afraid to focus too much on sex so I stayed on the weight loss road, but I wasn’t in love with it.
Then one day one of the women from that group contacted me through a private group that we had formed for women who were more sexually adventurous and asked a health question. And it hit me. THIS is what I’m supposed to do.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that my calling … my passion … the thing I was put on this earth to do … was to help women understand both the physical and nutritional side of sexual wellness (from vaginal dryness to painful intercourse to a hiding libido) as well as giving them a safe place to ask questions about what is “normal” or “acceptable”, to get out of their heads and to explore this area.
For some reason sexuality is still a somewhat taboo subject. Women don’t talk about it that much. I want to change that. I want every woman to feel strong and empowered. Regular sex is healthy from a physiological perspective, as well as an emotional perspective and you can’t beat it for stress relief!
I am not a sex therapist, a psychologist or counsellor. I am a female nutritionist who has gone through a lot in her life and simply wants to provide other women with a safe haven. If it’s out of my realm of ability, I will definitely refer you to someone more qualified.
I’ve run the gamut from being very promiscuous in my younger years, to losing interest because I was so stressed out and my hormones were out of balance (and my weight was up so I didn’t feel attractive) and intercourse hurt (so of course if it hurts you don’t want to do it) to getting my life back in balance and enjoying a great sex life.
It’s freeing and empowering and fun and I recommend it for every woman … regardless of who your partner is or if you even have a partner.
So what does all this mean for Stepping Stones Wellness? I will continue to walk you through the different hormones as I have been doing each week. There is so much to discuss and not all of it is sex related. But there will be an additional post on Thursdays where we’ll talk about sex baby! There will also be 2 new Facebook groups … one for the “safer” topics like vaginal dryness, post-pregnancy challenges and lack of libido (this one will be a closed group) and one for the more adventurous … a safe place to talk about your kinkier side, whether it’s questions about what’s safe or just sharing what you enjoy doing (this will be private). If you’d like to join either one, please message me, indicate which one and I’ll add you in. I hope to foster a safe, fun, enjoyable place where women can talk to other women and share experiences and concerns.
November 30th is my last day in my corporate job and I can’t wait to devote more time to serve you. Part of my service is providing you with programs you can follow either online or in an individual consultation with me on any aspect of hormone balancing, not just sexual health and wellness.